This Life Eternal
by Saerry Snape
Summary: [Creature of Darkness sequel]  The years after the destruction of Sunnydale...Xander continues on and realizes just how hard it is to really accept the deaths of those he loves.
1. Stack Them Up

"Uncle Xander!" exclaimed a childish treble, hearable by parents and neighbors as a seven-year-old body rushed across a yard.

"Whelp!" came the reply from a young man who looked to have just graduated high school as he swept the tiny form up. Dangling the brunette girl under one arm, he continued towards the front door without breaking stride, and knocked politely.

Faith answered the door and smiled as Xander grinned cheekily at her and gestured towards the kicking feet trapped under his arm.

"I found this in the front yard and thought you might want to keep it."

"Why how thoughtful of you," she said with a laugh as she opened the screen door for him. "Di, you had better go get your room clean before your father gets home."

"But Uncle Xander's here!" exclaimed the girl as he set her down in front of him. She tugged on his hands and looked up at her mother with perfect puppy eyes. "I can clean my room later!"

Xander chuckled and leaned down, saying, "I'm going to be staying for a week, Di. That's plenty of time for you and me, so go do what your mom said, okay?"

"Okay!"

As the girl dashed off through the house, Faith shook her head, saying, "God, you're good with kids, Fangs."

"I just reverse everything my parents did and remember a bit of what Darien's did. And you're not so bad yourself. Di's a da-darn fine kid." At her arched eyebrow, he said, "Almost swore."

"So I noticed," she said with a smile. "I've done it myself. Can't be surprised with me though, can yah?" Shaking her head then, she leaned forward to hug him tightly and hissed in his ear, "What did you get sent here for?"

Xander sighed and pulled away, softly replying, "I've been finding these cultists all over the place where I've been over the past two years. Council's gotten news of them too and so have a few other contacts of mine. Since Bob and his team got wind of an apocalyptic looking plot, I've been trying to hunt them down."

Faith blinked then hissed, "They're here? In Cleveland?"

"No, its somewhere out in the countryside – middle of nowhere. I just thought I'd drop in before I went after them."

"Why haven't I heard about this?"

Xander ducked his head at that and mumbled, "Er…I asked Giles to keep this low-key." Looking up at her seriously, he continued, "These cultists are bad news, Faith. They've made deals with demons and anything else nasty that they could and are damn tough. Even I had a tough time taking a few of them out."

"Shit. You need my help then."

"Absolutely not."

"What?! Fangs…"

"Di needs her mother," he hissed. "You're the Slayer, yeah, but bloody hell, Faith, you're thirty-one now. And pregnant!"

She gasped, one hand flying to her flat stomach, and gasped, "How?"

"Well, there's this talk about the birds and the bees I could tell you…"

"Fangs!"

Xander tapped the side of his nose and replied, "I smelled it. Plus I can just sense the edge of another presence in you – three weeks along?"

"Four," replied Faith softly. "Just found out yesterday and I…Christ, I forgot. I haven't even told Saul yet."

"You ought to do that tonight," he said with a smile. "He's a good man. Hell of a lot better than that wanker Wood."

She laughed at that and shook her head at him.

"You've been hanging around Bob again, haven't you?"

"Yeah, I was with him all last month hunting down demons and a branch of the cultists in South America. But my statement remains the same even if I was happy for you then."

Faith shrugged, saying, "It seemed like a good idea at the time. We both seemed to need someone at that point just to be there. Two months after Sunnydale collapsed, I realized I wasn't really in love with him. But you know all that."

Xander nodded, saying, "That doesn't mean I don't mind hearing it again. Anyway, I figured I'd ask if I could stay the night on your couch before I started hunting."

"You know you're always welcome here, Fangs."

"Yeah, but its polite to ask first."

She smiled and said, "Stay as long as you like."

"Thanks. Should be just for a week, like I said to Di."

Faith nodded then they were interrupted as the seven-year-old sprinted back into the room, flinging herself onto Xander with a cry of, "Room's clean, can we play now, Mom, can we, can we, can we?"

Laughing at her daughter's enthusiasm, the Slayer replied, "I suppose so. You five by five with that, Fangs?"

"For my favorite goddaughter?" questioned the vampire as he bent to lift the girl up into his arms. "I'm shocked you even had to ask!"

"I'm your only goddaughter, Uncle Xander!"

"Now that, my little whelp, is beside the point. So what shall we do, hmm? And don't you suggest playing dolls!"

"I don't play with dolls!" exclaimed Di as Xander carried her back towards her room.

"You don't?" Faith heard him ask in faux shock. "I thought all little girls played with dolls."

"Nuh-uh!"

"Well then what have we? Holy crap, Transformers! Di, my whelp, you are ever more precious! And they're original ones too…"

Laughing, the Slayer shook her head and moved towards the kitchen to start fixing dinner, content in listening to their muffled voices through the walls. It was good to have her friend back in her house.


	2. Watch Them Fall

For a moment he lingered outside, standing on the sidewalk considering the building in front of him, eyes closed as he stretched out his senses. There were a lot more people than he remembered being there the last time he'd been here…but that had been almost a decade ago now.

Sighing, Xander drew back from the building until all he could sense was himself then started towards the door. Thanks to the ring on his right hand, the door opened easily at his pull, and he was glad to see the wards hadn't been changed from their original specifications. They didn't want to be rid of him just yet, it seemed.

A girl rose as he entered, looking confused for a moment, then she seemed to recognize him and gasped. He smiled at her and moved on, finding those that he came across moving out of his path, gazing at him as he went past with a kind of awe and reverence.

There was some hate too – he could feel it curling along the edges of his senses like some prowling beast.

But he wasn't here for them.

Walking the paths of the mansion, he finally stopped at a door, staring at it for a long moment. Then, as he leaned forward to grasp the doorknob, he felt a flicker of familiarity behind him and turned his head to see Kennedy standing there. No longer a potential Slayer but unable to leave, she had stayed on with the Council during its rebuilding and was one of the most important people they had now.

"It's been a while, Xander," she said softly. "You look well."

He chuckled at that, saying, "I always do it seems." Then he fully turned towards her, taking in her slightly frazzled appearance and the dark circles under her eyes but noted her still holding herself upright. And despite being somewhere in her thirties now if he calculated right, she looked a decade younger. "How much longer?"

"Not much. That's why I called you – I knew you'd want to see him." Moving forward, she leaned around him and turned the doorknob, only just pushing it open. "And he wanted to see you."

"Everyone wants to see me," said Xander with a smile. Then he frowned at the door, nodding to himself for a moment before he entered, closing it firmly behind him.

The room was just as he remembered it: bookshelves lining the walls, bogged down with the weight of ancient volumes; the desk that had always been piled with paperwork though now it was empty; and the feeling of almost peace that radiated from everywhere. Smiling, he slowly moved across the main part of the room towards the open door that led to the bedroom, the beeping of the machines inside already in his ears.

The figure lying despondent in the bed wasn't the man he remembered from before at any point. He was frail and weak, something Xander had never associated with him, but he smiled warmly as he saw the vampire.

"Xander."

"Hey, Giles. Lookin' good."

Giles chuckled and said, "Now that is a bloody good lie. Come. Sit down."

Xander obeyed and walked over to sink into the chair next to the bed, his mind racing over several different things. He jumped when there was a feathery touch on his hand, Giles' hand on his, and looked at him.

"I…"

"There's nothing that can be done," said the Watcher gently. Xander groaned at that and carefully took the frail hand in both of his, leaning forward slightly in his chair. "It was a curse none of us even realized was cast and by the time we did it was too late. The damage had been done."

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"There was nothing that could be done. And I didn't want you to worry."

The vampire frowned and hissed, "I always worry. Also I…God, I'd hoped you wouldn't be the next to go. The world hates me though, doesn't it?"

"No…"

"I can feel them out there, Giles – there are already those in the Council that are coming to hate me. They've called me, begged me to do more than I do already even though they don't even know half of what I do other than their tasks."

Giles sighed, saying, "These new one's don't understand things so much as we did. All of the old Council is dying out and a new one is being born even now – one Kennedy will lead."

"Really?"

"Iron clad in my will," confirmed the dying man with a smile. "I made sure of that."

"She'll do good."

"Indeed." Giles started coughing then and Xander rose worriedly but the Watcher waved him back down after the fit faded. "Sit, sit."

"I should go…"

"Why do you think I asked Kennedy to call you here, Xander?"

"There are any number of reason that could be. Though you're not about to give the Council to me to run."

"Certainly not," said the man with a weak smile. Then he clenched his hand slightly where Xander still held it and continued, "I wanted to apologize."

"For what?"

"Many things…not being able to help you years ago for one."

The vampire looked at him with eyes edged suddenly with a pale purple and murmured, "That wasn't your fault."

Giles nodded slightly sand said, "I still feel like I failed you. I'm sorry for what happened ten years ago as well – that you had to see that."

Xander stared at him, eyes darkening entirely to purple then lightening to a luminescent white blue before red flickered in. He closed his eyes then as he remembered the screaming from a decade ago, the voice he loved echoing in his head like a siren, as they tore her apart. And he hadn't been able to do a thing to stop it.

"That wasn't your fault either," he hissed.

"It wasn't yours either, son. Gibbens, the one that called to give the order, he's the one to blame. But still…I feel it was my fault for trusting anyone else with that knowledge." Giles drew in a choked, hacking breath then and continued, "I'm so very sorry for that, son. Faith…"

"She was _pregnant_," hissed Xander, his head bowed against his chest. "She was going to have another baby and raise Di and it to be some of the best damn people in the world. Then that bastard…he gave her to those monsters. I _told_ her it was too dangerous! _I told her…_"

Red streaks that anyone else might think were blood but Giles knew were tears ran down his cheeks then and he breathed, "I couldn't save her. They were too strong, even for me. The only reason I'm even still here is because I let the Rogue have control in that moment – I let him out and I _fed him_. I let him have all my rage and my hate and my fear and we _destroyed_ those mother fuckers."

"It…he worked with you?"

Xander nodded, growling, "I loved her. _He_ loved her. Because we're not two separate entities, Giles, but two parts of the same whole." He then sobbed openly, one short burst of pain he couldn't bear to keep inside, and hunched in on himself. "God, she must hate me."

Giles was silent for a long moment then said softly, "Faith could never hate you, son. You know that."

"Yeah, but sometimes it feels better to think so."

"Don't wallow in that," said the older man weakly. "You didn't let her nor I."

Xander shook his head, muttering, "I don't know why I deserve to live when those around me die. What did I do, Giles? What did I do wrong to deserve this?"

"Nothing. You did nothing, son. And all you can do now is live."

"I don't want to! Damnit…" He trailed off and clasped both hands around the one frail one, staring at the Watcher with more blood tears streaming down his cheeks and his eyes almost entirely white but for the slight shade of blue. "This is all happening too soon," he whispered.

Giles smiled at that. "Your sense of time, I think, has become somewhat stagnant. Twenty years have passed."

"Only twenty! I shouldn't have had to say goodbye so soon! I thought…I thought I'd have more time." The vampire sighed then breathed, "But the world isn't that fair, is it?"

"No, its not. If it were fair, Faith would still be alive and you wouldn't have to live beyond us all. We must live with the cards we are dealt, Xander."

"Yeah…"

His head then whipped up and he leaned forward as Giles' eyes started to close, screaming, "Giles! Goddamnit, not yet! Please!"

The Watcher smiled at him, a wan and sad thing, then murmured, "I've seen the last thing in this world I wanted to see before I died. Give me peace, you bloody pillock."

Xander wept openly at that, clutching tightly to the frail hand. But he nodded and Giles smiled, reaching up to lay his other hand on the dark head, fingers knotting weakly in the vampire's hair.

"Son…"

Xander didn't answer – he knew there would be no response if he did. The heartbeat in the room was gone, the machines screaming out in warning the instant it was. He ignored them, ignored those streaming in as well, and laid his head down on the edge of the bed, Giles' hand still clutched in his.

Two decades ago he'd thought he was ready to live forever.

Now he knew that he was far from that point. And probably never would reach it.


	3. Gone Down In Flames

"No one could've survived that," breathed Tanya next to him as they stared at the wreckage that was all left of the Council house in Cleveland. Xander growled, remembering what the house had used to be – Faith's house. The home where he'd visited her, talked with her, laughed with her, played games with a smiling Di.

Gone.

"Someone will pay," he vowed hoarsely. "Who was in there?"

Tanya frowned and counted off on her fingers, "George, Anna, Keri, Lucas, and…" Her expression turned to terror and she finished with a gasp, "Willow."

Xander stiffly stared at her for a moment then looked at the wreckage again. It was a flaming mess, the fire so hot even he couldn't get close to it without fearing being burnt – Willow's spell work. He knew it. He could smell her magic in the air now, feel it still tingling along his senses as he stretched them out.

The warning about the threat to the house had come too late for them to do anything. They had thought it would be in the old farm where Xander has slaughtered the cult sixteen years before and that was where they, he and Tanya, has been when the real threat was discovered.

Both of them had arrived at the house to find it in flames, culprits already gone.

He felt the rage flickering like flames, the Rogue lapping it up like chocolate and cackling from the darker corners of his mind. It didn't care for Willow – never had. The only person it had even showed a smidgen of anything towards had been Faith.

Stepping quickly away from Tanya, he bared his fangs for a moment then lunged towards the car sitting by the curb. With a twist and a roar of mixed rage and sorrow, he lifted it and smashed it against the sidewalk repeatedly until it caught fire. When that happened he hurled what remained of it towards the burning house and watched the gas tank explode before it hit the ground.

"Shit," he heard Tanya mutter and turned slowly towards the current Slayer. "You okay?"

"No," he growled in response. He then raked a hand across his face and spat, "Where the hell's the Council?"

"They should be here soon."

"They should've been here before we were!" he roared angrily. As she took a step back, he held up a hand, taking a deep breath in an attempt to calm himself. "I'm not angry at you, Tany."

The second Slayer Called after Faith died gave him a look that said she didn't entirely believe that. She then pulled out her cell phone as it started ringing and screaming into it.

"Where the hell are you people?! Yes, we're here! NO, EVERYTHING IS NOT FUCKING OKAY, YOU ASSHAT! The house is gone – GONE. No survivors! How do I know?"

Tanya slowly looked at Xander, who was growling and giving the phone the look he gave a meal when he'd gone days without blood.

"I've got Xander with me," she snapped coldly into the phone. "If anyone had survived, he'd know it. Now get your fucking asses out here and get our people out of there. They deserve a decent burial."

The phone shut with a finial click and she hissed before shoving it back in her pocket. Then she gave him a long, considering look and said, "You're going, right?"

"If this is how the Council is run now, yes," he replied. He then looked towards the wreckage and added, "Besides…the last two people left that I love have nothing to do with it. I have no reason to stay anymore."

Tanya frowned, saddened by this even though she knew it would happen eventually. And, despite how much Xander tended to scare her, she'd come to like having him at her side every few months or so. He'd helped her a lot when she'd first gotten Called, too, and she would be grateful to him for that until the day she died.

"Can I still call you?" she asked softly, afraid he was going to say no.

The stony expression softened and he murmured, "If you need help, don't hesitate to call me, Tany. I said my ties with the Council were broken, not you."

"Will you come to the funeral?"

"Willow's," he answered, turning away from her. "Do me a favor."

"Yes?" she said.

"Have them bury her at the Coven, not the Council graveyard. Underneath that big old oak." Xander smiled wistfully and softly added, "She loved that tree."

Tanya nodded, swearing, "I'll make sure they do."

"Thank you."

He gave her a sad smile over his shoulder then he disappeared, there one moment then just gone. She sighed and sank down onto the sidewalk to wait for the Council team to arrive, watching the magical flames begin to slowly gutter and die.

And she made herself a promise that she would find out just who had destroyed the building and the people inside. Then her and Xander – just the two of them, like they'd found the building all alone together – would go after them.

They'd make the bastards pay.


	4. When Everything Crumbles

"I thought you didn't drink."

Xander growled weakly in response and glared at the reflection in his glass from where his head laid on the table. Bob sighed and sat down across from him in the booth, eying the sea of beer bottles and glasses that lay scattered between them.

"I," snarled the vampire after moment, "rather unfortunately, can no longer get drunk."

"Damn right," said the immortal man. "I'd die after drinking all of this haul. Bloody hell, man, have things gotten that bad?"

Xander grumbled something incoherent then sat up, scrubbing both hands across his face. He then started ticking off on his fingers and talking at the same time.

"A decade after Sunnydale, I lose Faith," he snarled, but his voice held no anger in it. "Another decade and Giles dies from a curse no one saw coming. Six years and then I lose Willow because the Council couldn't tell their ass from their brain."

Bob spent a moment counting mentally then said, "And now, forty-five years after all that?"

The vampire's face spasmed and he muttered, "Dawnie. She's been getting worse these last few years. Her kids forced her into a home and then she ended up in the hospital on life support two months ago. And they…they're cutting it off tonight."

"A merciful death," murmured Bob as Xander bowed his head onto the table. "You can't blame yourself for this, y'know. It was bloody well bound to happen."

"She's the last thing I have of them, Bob," he breathed, fighting back the tears. "She's the last remnant of Sunnydale besides me and I'm about to lose her. My family…hell, my kid." He sat up, slamming his fist against the table hard enough to crack it, and stared at the immortal with blood tears running down his cheeks. "And I'm going to have to pretend to be her fucking grandson to even get in to say goodbye."

"The kids know?"

"It kinda gets obvious after a while that the guy you've called 'Grandpa' your whole life doesn't get any older."

"Yeah, you gotta point." Bob reached out and picked up one of the glasses, regarding it for a moment before sitting it back down. "So you came in here and tried to drown your sorrows…"

Xander nodded then snarled, "Which did jack shit. Goddamnit…" He reached into his coat and pulled out a phone, flipping it open hurriedly. "What?!"

His expression softened then and he breathed, "Hi, sweetie. No, no, I'm not angry at you, Hannah. I promise. Yeah, pinky swear and cross my heart even." He paused for a moment, glancing at Bob, then nodded, saying, "I'm going to be there tonight, don't you worry. Yeah, we'll give Grandma our goodbyes together. Promise. 'Bye."

As he hung up the phone, Xander closed his eyes and slowly bowed his head back to the table. Bob watched him for a long moment then gently probed, "That was…?"

"Hannah," came the half-muffled reply. "She's six. Dawn's littlest grandkid."

The vampire sat up then, wiping his face with his sleeve, and sighed. "This year just keeps getting better and better. And Di, Faith's kid, she's been diagnosed with terminal cancer."

"Christ," hissed Bob. "That's a bloody streak of bad luck."

"Follows me like a fucking lost puppy," grumbled Xander. "If I could, I'd kick it and make it run yelping to go find a new master."

"If only. But we have to take what life throws at us, as one old sergeant under me used to say, whether it be a knife or cake."

"Pff. I'd like to stick a knife in life and see how it likes it."

Bob smiled then looked at his watch, asking, "What time tonight exactly were they going to be…y'know?"

"Six," replied Xander. "Why?"

"S'quarter to that now. You'd better get a move on, kid."

"Shit. Er…can you cover the bill for me?"

The immortal nodded and said, "No trouble. Get your ass moving."

"Thanks, Bob," breathed Xander. He then started towards the doors of the bar, striding out them and heading in the direction he knew the hospital was. It wasn't a long walk, so he actually walked it instead of running, savoring the cool air of the outside.

Just as he went to open the door to go into the hospital, he heard the hint of something and turned…exactly in time to just barely snatch a dart from the air.

"The hell?"

He flicked two other darts aside then and glanced around suspiciously, not sensing anything around him. Wait…he couldn't even sense the people just there in the hospital. Was something blocking him?

No, it couldn't be.

Xander growled and tossed the dart's aside, starting to reach into his coat for the gun he'd begun carrying three decades ago – a big .50 Desert Eagle that carried rounds able to kill vampires and just about any demon he came across. Just as his hand closed around the handle, he caught the trickle of something just behind him and spun.

A dart caught him in the back of the neck and the person he'd sensed right as they got behind him buried a dagger up to the hilt in his side. He lashed out, trying to grab them, but his head was already spinning and he felt himself falling.

_Poison!_ He thought desperately. _No…what the hell is this?!_

Twitching on the ground, he growled as he was moved, hands picking him up from the ground and carrying him into a van. Then they took his gun, his coat, the dagger he'd carried for years since taking it from Giles' stores – even his wallet with the carefully preserved pictures of his family.

A face, female and brunette, swam into view then and he struggled to make his mind work. It should be working! There should be nothing that could do this to him!

"Very sorry," she said, not sounding at all apologetic. "But we really need to have a look at you, vampire. I mean…think of all the things we could do with something like you."

"No!" croaked Xander, the fear at those words allowing him to briefly break through the numbness. He reached for the Rogue as it started to swallow him again, tried to pull forward that vicious creature and wrap it around himself, but it was as trapped as he was. It roared in anger and he eventually found himself panicking, losing all sense of himself until they were both one screaming entity.

"Knock him out," came an order then from a rough, rock-hard voice.

Xander felt the prick of a needle in his arm through the numbness and flailed behind the wall that kept him from doing anything as he started to sink into blackness. Right before it did, he heard the woman hiss in his ear, "Dawn Summers is dead. You failed her."

He managed to scream at that then the blackness consumed him entirely.

* * *

_Yes, by God, I AM evil. Because if you can't be evil to a character and torment them, then what the hell kind of story are you going to have?_


	5. The Beast Awakens

"So…you've had him here for how long?"

"Almost sixty years now," replied the woman walking alongside the man. She was an older, graying brunette but the same woman from sixty years before. The woman that had told Xander Harris he had failed Dawn Summers.

Smiling, she continued, "There have been some improvements since then but…a few experiments have simply failed."

The man nodded, blue eyes hooded, and said, "Ah. What has succeeded then?"

"Our agents now heal and move somewhat faster thanks to our experiments. That is all we have managed in these sixty years." She scowled briefly but quickly hid it. "It is as though he is resisting us even underneath all we have him under to hold him."

"Intriguing. What else is it you've been trying to do?"

"Create more like him," she replied with a broad smile. "We dreamed of having an army like him. Just imagine what could be done with such a force!"

The man nodded again, glancing towards the room below them.

"I can imagine," he murmured, eyes never pulling away from the unmoving but manacled figure below. "But you say it's as thought he's resisting you."

"That's all we can describe it as. Ah, I have to take this, Major, excuse me for cutting the tour short."

He held up a hand, waving it off, and turned to look down below them.

"That is fine," he said. "I can find my way around, I think. Thank you very much, Doctor Kynes."

The woman smiled then left, leaving him alone in the hallway that looked down onto the room below. He leaned against the railing and stared down at the figure chained to the bed, hiding the rage he felt from his face but not his eyes.

Below him the scientists bustled around their workstations and, as he watched, one slowly walked up to the unmoving figure on the bed. His jaw clenched as they stuck a needle into the pale arm then a smile slowly stretched across his face as he noticed something. A slight twitch of muscle, the twist of the head, right eye fluttering slightly to reveal a sliver of dark eye that he could see the insanity in even from this far away.

Smiling coldly, he moved away from the railing and down the corridor, carefully making his way out of the underground place. As he reached clean air, he pulled a slim silver case from his pocket and lit a cigar as he walked slightly away from the building that covering the installation.

After a moment he stopped and leaned against a wall, loosening the collar of the major's uniform that he'd stolen. Behind him there was a spark then a voice asked, "He in there?"

"He's there," replied the man. He blew out a cloud of smoke then continued, "Not that great a defense; give me a bit of C4 and I could blow it sky high."

"But he's in there so we're not."

"Nope," growled Bob around his cigar as he shrugged out of the major's coat. "We're gonna go in there, let him go, and then sit back and watch." He puffed on the cigar for a moment, smiling ferally at the thought. "Oh, this'll be pretty damn beautiful," he murmured. "Pretty bloody damn beautiful."

From the shadows Spike smiled then flicked his cigarette butt away, blowing out a few rings of smoke.

"Let's get this show on the road then. I'm in the mood for a bloody good show."

---

There was nothing. Only darkness.

Darkness and the sense of there being something there every once in a while.

He struggled, snarling within himself as he fought.

And every time he failed, the rage just built, sizzling underneath the surface and blocking out everything else. It was all he could feel now as it continually burned through his veins.

Once upon a time they'd been two separate beings but now…the rage made them one.

Then…the darkness faded.

He could…feel.

He could _feel_!

The prick in his arm again, a needle – A NEEDLE! Taking blood.

BLOOD!

He surged upwards with a roar, the chains that held him snapping like they were made out of butter. The woman screamed but was cut off as he grabbed at her, sensing the pulse beating wildly underneath her skin, the needle snapping off where it was in his arm. As he pulled her close, burying his face against her throat, his fangs sinking into her flesh after the blood in her.

He heard the shouts around him but the blood was first…everything else could be dealt with after!

The corpse slid to the floor as he released it and he smiled, baring bloody fangs at the men that faced him with their guns. He could smell their fear and his blood in them. HIS BLOOD.

They took his blood!

They chained him!

They tortured him!

THEY HAD KEPT HIM FROM HER!

He snarled and surged from the bed, uncaring of his lack of clothes and weapons. They were weak! They were human! He was power!

The men fired, bullets ripping into him but they didn't hurt at all. Blood spattered but the wounds healed and he plunged into them like a hurricane, a smile on his faces as he ripped arms from their sockets and used them as clubs. He tore through them, taking blood as he went, then stood amongst the corpses breathing in the destruction.

But these were not the ones that had caged him.

He wanted them.

A feral smile twisted his lips and he looked up towards the glass hallway above him. Then, with a ripple of muscle, he leapt and crashed through it. Another man faced him with a gun and he blurred forward, casually ripping his head away from his shoulders and held it above his as the blood dripped, lapping it up.

Then he tossed it aside and moved on, sniffing as he went.

He would find them.

And they would pay for their mistakes with their lifeblood!

---

"Oh my God," breathed Spike as he looked over Bob's shoulder at the computer screen. The man had managed to hack into their systems whilst they were inside releasing Xander and now they were flipping through the camera systems, following his progress as he moved through the underground installation. "It's a monster. That Rogue."

Bob frowned and said, "I don't think that's just the Rogue."

"What then?"

"I think that's the both of them."

"As…as one?" asked the vampire, paling. At the man's nod, he muttered, "Bloody hell. Look! Christ, look, man!"

Bob turned back towards the computer and winced at the sight. Xander, wearing blood for clothes and a feral expression that reached right to the ancient cords in humanity and twanged them, had found the woman that had been showing him around. He heard the sounds then and reached over to turn the speakers up, the woman's shrieking becoming audible.

"No, you've got the wrong person! I didn't do that! I didn't say that! Please! _Please, don't kill me!_"

There was a growl that rang over the speakers, a growl that did the same thing that feral smile did. Bob pushed himself away from the computer as every nerve screamed 'GET AWAY!' and he heard Spike's gasp behind him. When he turned, the vampire was clutching at a nearby chair, his true face showing and full of fear.

Their eyes met and they didn't need to speak. Both of them knew what had happened to them when they heard that growl.

As they moved back closer to the computer, they heard a voice come from the speakers. It was rough from disuse and rippling with rage but they could both hear Xander's voice underneath the insanity that it practically sang with.

"I smell you, little girl," he growled as he stalked towards her on the screen. "You were there. Haha, stabbed me with a blade after one of your friends shot me with those precious darts of yours. Age doesn't fool me."

"Please! Please, you could just leave now!"

"Leave now? Now when you're still here? Oh, no, no, no, I'm afraid that's not going to happen, little girl."

Bob stared as suddenly he moved on the screen, abruptly gone from one side of the room to shoving the woman against the wall. Her graying head smacked against the concrete loud enough to make him and Spike wince and she moaned.

"There," hissed Xander, leaning close to her. "The bones in your skull are broken. Ah, and if I reach around and press…just so…" He moved his head around her head and the scream that tore from her throat was something of a broken animal, not a human. "There we are! Do you feel that pain, little girl? DO YOU?!"

"_YES!_" she screamed, sagging against him where he leaned against her, pressing her against the wall with his entire body.

"That is only flicker of the pain I have felt. The pain you and yours put me through. Haha." He smirked and leaned close to her, Bob shivering as he licked her neck. "You stupid people woke the monster."

"Bob," breathed Spike, leaning towards the computer. "Turn it off."

"I turn it off and we might lose him," hissed the man.

"You don't turn that off, we're going to see something we don't want to," gasped the vampire. He pointed at the screen and continued, "I've seen Angelus work and he disgusted even me. What the whelp's about to do…that's going to be a bloody horror."

Bob stared at him for a moment then nodded, looking at the computer screen for a long moment before he reached over and turned it off.

---

"Xander?" called out Bob, wielding a flashlight as he and Spike crept into the underground installation. He then paused as his boot _squished_ into something and muttered, "I am not looking down to see what that was."

From behind him Spike inhaled then said, "Bloody good idea. Keep moving, huh?"

"Can you smell him?"

"Over all this piss? He might can do that but I can't!"

Bob snorted then continued on down the dark corridor, trying not to look too closely at the unmoving lumps on the floor. By now, his nostrils had become used to the smell of blood around him and he was half moving on autopilot, automatically going back along the path towards the room where he'd seen Xander held.

As they came out into the hallway above it, they stopped in their tracks at a shriek of mixed rage and pain. Spike shuddered then they started moving again, Bob shining the light down into the room through the hole in the glass. Behind him, the vampire snorted and punted something down the corridor, muttering, "Heh, football."

"Spike!" hissed the immortal angrily. He then peered down into the darkness and called, "Xander? Kid? You there?"

A hiss from below somewhere in the darkness answered and the voice they'd heard earlier through the computer howled, "They deserved it! They caged me!"

"Yeah," said Bob. "They deserved that, kid, for what they did to you. Now, c'mon. Let's go out of here, eh?"

"Out," repeated Xander. "Out…side." There was a gasp from below and then he spoke again, the insanity of the Rogue fading from his voice as he did so. "B-Bob?"

"Yeah, its me, Xander."

"You're…above?"

"We're in the hallway. You think you can jump up here?"

"Easy."

Bob stepped back then something loomed up out of the dark, landing right at the edge of the shattered window. In the light of the flashlight he and Spike could see Xander crouching there somewhat different than they'd last seen him. He was wearing a pair of pants now, though they were almost falling off his hips, and it looked like he had tried to wipe off some of the blood that had caked against his skin.

"Christ," muttered Spike and Xander's head whipped towards him, hair swaying slightly as it was hardened into spikes from blood.

"You?" he asked, his voice still half a growl. "You…helped?"

"Yeah," replied the vampire slowly. "I've been at the lovely hands of the military myself and it's not a bloody walk in the park."

Xander stared at him for a moment then stood up, nodding towards him. He then looked at Bob and made what looked like an effort to smile – it was hard to tell just what expression he was making behind the mask of blood.

Bob stared at him for a moment then reached out to touch one bloodstained arm only to have it jerked back, eyes that were suddenly a bright white-blue focusing solidly on his. Lowering his hand, he said gently, "Let's go outside, kid. C'mon this way."

With him in the front, Xander following, and Spike inching along further back, they slowly made their way outside. Bob turned and watched carefully as the previous captive moved gingerly out into the light of dusk with nostrils flaring. He glanced around as if looking for more of those from inside and all the immortal could compare his movements to were that of a deer.

For a long moment he just stood then his head slowly turned towards Bob and Xander breathed, "This…this is real?" His voice was plaintive, a child's question, and the man nodded slowly as Spike pulled a thick blanket over his head to protect himself from the last of the sun.

"This is real," said Xander, dropping down to one knee. He touched the dirt underneath him gently then sobbed, tears flowing and mixing with the grime on his face. "Oh God…"

With that he crumpled to the ground, folding up as though boneless, and Bob quickly moved to his side. Sighing, he looking up at Spike, who was staring worriedly down at the crumpled and bloody form on the ground. The vampire then peered at the sky before stepping back towards the darkness and tossed the blanket at the immortal.

"Cover him up and carry him back," he said quickly, slapping out a small spark that caught his hand. "I'll bring some blood around after dark comes."

"Thanks." Silently, Bob wrapped the blanket around Xander then managed to sling him over his shoulder, grunting under the weight. Then he looked towards the vampire's dark form and asked, "Spike?"

"Oi?"

"Why are you doing this?"

There was silence then a cigarette lit up and Spike replied, "I was Buffy's champion…don't know bloody well why. But I think she'd be pissed to know I was around and ignored the whelp when he needed a hand." He paused, blowing out smoke, then finished, "He might've never liked me but he never really told me to bugger off. Bastard saved my bleedin' ass even so I owe him one besides."

Bob nodded slowly then turned and slowly walked off with his heavy burden, his mouth moving silently as he prayed to God that the poor boy would recover.


	6. An Offer Refused

"Sixty years," hissed Xander. "Sixty years, Bob!"

"I know, kid. I know."

"Do you? Do you really?"

Bob slowly looked towards him where they stood on a country bridge in England, leaning on the railing side-by-side. A mile away was an ancient cottage the immortal had owned for at least a century and had carefully kept. It was here that he had brought Xander after freeing him six months before during the two weeks the vampire had been unconscious. Since then, he had been fighting tooth and nail to bring back the man he'd known out of the almost insane creature he'd become.

"No," he replied after a moment, "I really don't. Just…" Bob ran a hand back through his hair, saying, "Christ, kid, stop it. You've made it this far – almost as far back to normal as you're probably going to get. Don't slide back."

Xander scowled, staring at the river beneath them.

"Why not?" he spat viciously. "I _promised_ her that I'd be there. And I was so close…"

Shaking his head, he asked, "What did they want me for? I know you hacked into their system and took whatever the hell they had. And who were they?"

"Our military," replied Bob in a disgusted tone. "And, yes, I did take their files. Destroyed the bloody system too."

"What did they take me for, Bob?" demanded the vampire.

The immortal sighed heavily and nudged a stick on the edge of the bridge down into the water.

"They wanted to make an army."

Xander stared for a moment then snarled, shoving himself away from the railing. He spat, "An army! They wanted an army of vampires!"

"It would be a powerful force."

"And what when one of them turned out to be a Rogue? What the fuck would they do when the poor sap went mad and started killing them all?" He then laughed hoarsely, saying, "Ha, they'd do just what they've done already. Die a messy death."

Snorting, he ducked his head and leaned heavily against the railing, hands clasped behind his neck. Bob looked at him sadly for a moment then looked away towards the river.

"What do I do now, Bob?"

"I don't know, kid. But it's your life, your choice for whatever you do next. I suppose you just survive."

Xander sighed then muttered, "Dunno how well I'm going to do that." He scrubbed a hand across his face as he straightened, staring sullenly towards the sky. "I wasn't cut out to live forever."

"None of us really are," said Bob as he clapped a hand on his shoulder. "But we do what we must. You'll figure something out, don't worry."

"I hope so."

Bob smiled, saying, "C'mon, kid, let's go get some grub."

"Alright. But you're cooking," replied Xander as they headed back towards the cottage.

"Bugger."

---

"Alexander Harris?"

Xander, hunched over in a table in a neutral demon-run bar, looked up towards the person speaking to him. He'd sensed them coming in – the slimy presence of them unable to allow him to ignore them – and smelled the demon blood mixed with human as they stepped towards his table. Slowly he picked up his glass, sipping idly at the blood, then frowned expectantly at the person.

The half-demon coughed, looking suddenly nervous in his expensive suit then reached into his coat. Xander's hand blurred instantly and suddenly there was a Desert Eagle lying on the table.

"Careful," he growled.

"Just reaching for some papers, Mister Harris," said the half-demon with a cold smile. He continued reaching into his coat and did indeed pull out a folded stack of papers, unfolding them and setting them down on the table. "My employer's have a proposal for you."

"Who's your employer?"

"Wolfram and Hart."

Xander's eyes narrowed at that.

"No thanks," he said. "I prefer to keep away from lawyers. Particularly lawyers that help demons, vampires, and killers get off."

"You are a vampire, Mister Harris," pointed out the half-demon.

Xander smiled at that, fangs flashing.

"I'm well aware of that. But I don't kill people."

"You have. We have kept records of your…ahem, other half's killing sprees, Mister Harris. Very carefully in fact."

"Blackmail?" inquired the vampire, arching an eyebrow. He then laughed, adding, "You don't want to make an enemy of me, Mister Lawyer."

"And you," said the half-demon, "do not wish to make an enemy of _us_, Mister Harris. In fact…we could give you back everything you desire. Your family…"

Xander was on his feet and had the barrel of the gun pressed to his forehead in a blur. Around him the bar burst into motion and the owner, a half-demon like the lawyer but more likeable, exclaimed, "Oy, break it up!" She rushed over to the table then came screeching to a halt as she realized who was holding the gun and the sudden crimson color of his eyes. "Oh, Christ, Mister Harris, please put down the gun. The spells…"

"I know what the neutrality spells will do if I actually fire this gun," growled the vampire. "But I'm not intending on firing, now am I, Mister Lawyer? And you are very quickly going to take those papers and leave without another word."

The half-demon sighed and picked up the papers, sliding them back into his coat. He then gave Xander a chilly look, saying, "You are making a grave mistake, Mister Harris. Wolfram and Hart could…"

"Could bring back my family, I know. But I'm also well aware of what that might very well do to them and the world – I've considered that so many times and read everything on it I could find. I'm not about to bring them back with the chance of something going wrong."

He lowered the gun then and slammed his fist down on the table, cracking it in twain. Xander smiled coldly, eyes burning the color of old blood, and snarled, "And if you so dare raise them to hold against me or dare try to blackmail me, I will come at you so fast you won't know what hit you. Even after that you won't know what hit you. I will _kill_ every single man, woman, demon, and vampire within your building and then I will bring it down on your corpses if you dare mess with my family. You understand that, Mister Lawyer?"

"We have a very clear understanding," replied the half-demon stiffly. He then smiled, stepping back, and said, "I'm very sorry you won't take our offer, Mister Harris. I had, ah, looked forward to working with you."

Xander smiled again, all fangs, and purred, "Well you'll just have to live with disappointment."

"It seems I shall. Farewell, Mister Harris."

The expensive suit smiled and left at that, the bar settling back down behind them. Even as the patrons settled, the owner looked closely at Xander.

"You okay?" she asked uneasily.

"No," growled the vampire in response. "I come in here to have one drink away from my mother hen keeper and I get that fucking moron." He then looked down and sighed heavily as he shoved the gun under his coat, the red fading from his eyes to leave them their odd mix of hazel and green again. "Sorry about the table, Reski."

"Tables can be replaced," said Reski, waving it off. Smiling, she added, "A good customer never can be. Shall I get you another drink? On the house, of course, since you got rid of that slime."

Xander smiled at that.

"I'll take the drink offer but I'll pay for it."

"You sure?"

"I know its hard enough to get blood as is," said Xander as they walked towards the bar, he taking a seat as she walked around to nudge the young man behind it out of the way with her hip. Reski nodded as she opened the small fridge behind the bar, pulling out a bottle with two fingers of one hand as she grasped a glass from the shelf behind her with the other. As she filled the glass and set it down in front of him, she admitted, "Anyone else would've taken me up on the offer no problem."

"I'm not most people," pointed out Xander as he picked up the glass.

"No, you're not."

Reski smiled and leaned on the bar, looking curiously at him. He blinked back at her and asked, "What?"

"You're just a strange creature," she replied. "Not like any of the other vampires in here."

"Well I'm not like any other vampire." Xander sipped the blood, absently wondering how he'd gotten to this point where he could just drink this so casually as if it were a Coke. And how long had it been…God, one hundred and fifty-three years. The last sixty of which had been a blur of rage in which his being had mixed with the Rogue's and they had only just barely come apart. It was far closer to the surface than he liked now but he truly could control it. They knew each other now – respected each other even, as much as they could.

"So I've noticed," said Reski with a smile. Then she frowned and added, "There are demons waiting for you outside with orders to kill you."

"I know, I sense them too," murmured Xander, remembering that Reski's demon half was a psychic type. "They came when the lawyer did. If they really knew anything about me, they'd know better than to try this."

Reski tilted her head to the side at that.

"Maybe it's a test."

"If I had accepted, I'd agree with you. Now it's just their attempt to try and either get rid of me or see just how far they can push me."

"How far will that be?" asked Reski.

Xander smiled and drained the last dregs in the glass, idly licking the edge of it before he set it back down on the bar. Then he leaned forward towards her and her eyes widened as she watched his eyes swirl, green flowing with hazel before scarlet flooded across both.

"Oh, I think they've pushed me far enough," he purred. "Keep your patrons inside for…oh, ten minutes. That should be enough time to deal with them."

"On your own?"

"I'll be fine," assured Xander. He gave her a rakish smile then was moving across the room, his form blurring and vanishing before he had reached the door. Reski blinked then rushed after him, already hearing the sounds of battle outside as she carefully pushed the door open to peer out. One of the demons – a big, heavily armored thing – crashed against the wall nearby as she looked around then she gasped as she followed its flight path and saw Xander. And she realized for the first time just how different from other vampires he really was.

She had seen vampires fight before – had even seen the Slayer once upon a time. Vampires were all power for the most part with Slayers almost the same but with some grace.

Xander, however, was something else entirely.

There was power behind every strike but each move was smooth and graceful with a savage undertone. He was a blur at times, only visible when he hit the ground or twisted in the air to deliver a shattering blow to a demon's face. It was…it was a beautiful and deadly dance that destroyed everything in its path and it took Reski's breath away.

"Wow," she murmured as the fight ended, the last demon's head sent careening away with an almost negligent backhand blow. Xander stood still amongst the carnage for a moment, the only sign of the battle the dark spatters at the edge of his long coat, then turned to smirk at the sky.

"I hope you enjoyed the show," he called out to the night. "Try it again and I'll come after you. I _can_ smell you, lawyers. I'd suggest you move on and try your tactics on someone without a working brain." With that he walked back towards the door and smiled as he saw Reski. "Watching the show?"

"That was beautiful," she breathed, staring at him. "Just…amazing."

He looked a bit shocked at the compliment then flushed slightly as he said, "Thanks. I should be getting back before the mother hen comes after me. You take care, Reski."

"You too, Mister Harris."

"Xander," he said with a smile as he turned to walk away.

Reski smiled, leaning against the doorframe, as she watched his retreating back. Then she turned and pulled the door closed, heading back towards her patrons, and savoring the fact that she could call him by his name now.

It meant…oh, it meant so many things.


	7. Breaking the Army

"So you're bedding a halfy, eh?"

Xander glared at Spike and growled, "That's none of your damn business. Now shut up."

"We can't have a bloody chat while we wait?" asked the blond as he lit a cigarette and leaned back into the low wall they hid behind. "There's still an hour left till they show."

The vampire snarled then spat, "Why are you interested in my life? Particularly my love life?"

Spike shrugged in response.

"Just making small talk."

"About me?"

"Just curious as to what sort of woman made you decide to bed her. As I recall, you and Faith were always making eyes at each other."

Crimson flared across Xander's eyes and he spat, "Faith was mortal, Spike, and I made myself a promise not to turn anyone I love because I didn't want to see them suffer the same as me. Reski is not."

"Not entirely," pointed out the other vampire.

"I am _well_ aware of that. Now…shh."

"Eh?"

"Shut up," snapped Xander as he reached out to snuff the cigarette. Spike grumbled then flicked it away before he turned to peer over the wall alongside the other man.

As they watched, a truck pulled up and four men in military uniforms carrying assault rifles climbed out, weapons at the ready the instant their feet touch the ground. From the passenger seat in the cab came a man in a doctor's coat and he moved to the back of the truck as the driver – another military man – moved to open it. The doctor reached within and hefted a rattling crate into his arms, nodding tensely at the driver before he cast a fearful gaze around them.

"You're sure we're safe?"

"We are perfectly safe, Doctor," replied the driver. "That thing shouldn't have any idea about these last samples."

"Its best that we keep it that way, Major."

Xander shifted slightly, drawing himself up into a ready crouch, his eyes flooding already with crimson and his fangs out. Spike readied himself beside him and asked softly, "Kill them all?"

"Leave the doctor for questioning," came the growled response. The blonde glanced towards his companion then quickly looked away as he saw his eyes burn crimson, flooded with the insanity of his own inner demon. "They wear the same uniform. Kill them. They don't deserve life."

Spike nodded slowly, sparing a quick glance towards the other vampire again. And he had thought his treatment at the hands of the military years ago was harsh…what he had gone through was nothing to what they had done to the forever young man beside him.

Xander twitched then his form blurred and was gone, Spike launching himself up from behind the wall and forward a moment later. He lunged at the nearest man, ripping the gun from his hands with little effort, and driving straight on for a killing blow at the throat as his demonic face showed through. As he turned and ripped the gun from another's hands, the other vampire blurred out of nowhere in midair. He hit the now unarmed soldier with both feet and rode him down, landing with a heavy crunch on his chest with all his weight. The ribs caved in, sending a cloud of blood into the air around the vampires, spattering them both with a fine mist.

Spike staggered back at the savageness of that attack, something more than he'd ever seen even when traveling with Angelus years before, and caught sight of the driver drawing a heavy gun that would even make them pause from under his coat. He called out a strangled cry of warning but it wasn't necessary. Xander leapt off the soldier's crushed chest, snarling before he blurred in mid-air and vanished to reappear moments later in front of the driver. His hand closed over the gun and he smiled ferally as he jerked it as well as the hand holding it sharply to the side.

The blond's throat convulsed as that movement half ripped the driver's arm from his body and he was torn between going after the blood and making a damn good attempt at throwing up. He held himself back as Xander left the man to bleed and jerked the fallen doctor to his feet, the man still holding frantically to the rattling crate.

"Drop it," snarled the vampire. The doctor shook his head, clutching at the crate as he gabbled, "No, no, I can't! We need these to – to…"

"To make an army of vampires?" spat Xander, lifting the man up by the collar of his coat. He then roared, "I WON'T ALLOW IT! Now drop the damn crate!"

"NO!"

Snarling, the vampire shoved the doctor against the truck with one hand and swatted the crate aside. It shattered as it hit the ground, vials of blood making tiny 'tink' noises as they broke against the concrete. The doctor moaned at the loss then swallowed hard as he saw the one man on the ground with his chest caved in and the driver slowly gasping out his last breaths as his blood drained away. He looked fearfully into Xander's insane crimson gaze and breathed, "You're going to kill me."

It wasn't a question and Spike started to take a step forward, saying, "This isn't the way to do this…"

"Yes, it is," growled Xander back. "I leave one alive, Spike, just _one_, and they might try this bullshit again. Sixty years I spent in that hell they threw me into – I won't let that happen to me again."

"Killing him won't bring those years back."

"When did you become the fucking voice of reason?"

Spike moved closer, so he was standing right next to the doctor on the other side and stared at the other vampire. The crimson gaze shifted towards him and he softly said, "When a very good man stopped _being_ the voice of reason."

Xander stared at him then looked hard at the doctor. "I leave him," he hissed, fear underlying his voice, "and they might come after me again. I – I can't take that, Spike. I _can't_."

"I know." Spike reached out to grasp his shoulder, slowly shaking his head in a silent 'no' and wondering just when he'd gone soft. Oh, yes, it was when he fell in love with her… And when had the whelp started to call him by his name? "But killing them isn't going to lessen that happening."

Xander stared at him, muscles in his jaw clenching as he twisted between killing the doctor and not. The small part of him that still lingered from before – the _good_ part – said that Spike was right. From its personal corner, the Rogue screamed for blood, its raw voice sounding as though right in his ear. And all of the rest of him that had gone mad then struggled back to sanity was torn between the two.

_But_, he asked himself, _which path is that of the man…and which is the monster?_

What would Willow think of him now?

Dawn? Giles?

_Faith_, his Faith, what would she think of him?

After a long moment he dropped the doctor unceremoniously to the ground and stepped back as the man scrambled away after getting his bearings. He shoved the Rogue's presence away and stared hard at Spike, who was frowning now.

"What?"

"Just wondering what they were doing exactly," replied the other vampire. "There must be some reason why they were transporting this."

Xander frowned then bounded over to the doctor, bowling the man over as he tried to rise, and pressed him to the ground with one foot. The man screamed then stilled with a hard jab of the heel and babbled, "Don't kill me, please don't kill me. I'll tell you anything – _anything!_"

"Tell me where you were taking my blood," snarled Xander. "What plot do you people still have?!"

"We…we had a backup plan in case you escaped."

"The blood?"

"A-a…an army! M-made from humans and demons, intended to b-be brought back b-by your bl-blood!"

"An army," growled Xander. "An army formed in the same make as ADAM and his get! HOW DARE YOU?!"

The doctor wailed in terror and Spike dared injury to himself as he darted forward, shoving Xander off of him before he could break his knee. Sniffling in fear, the man shuffled backwards then managed to get on his feet and start running. Xander tensed to go after him but actually did stop when the other vampire rested a hand against his chest.

"Spike," he rumbled darkly.

"Let him go," intoned Spike. "The blood's worthless to them now. They have nothing left, which makes whatever bodies they've got bloody useless."

Xander's eyes narrowed and he growled, "Nothing left but me."

"You think me, Bob, and that girl of yours are going to let those lunatics take you again? Really? After all the trouble it took to bloody get you the last time."

The younger vampire relaxed with a laugh at that, some of the crimson fading from his eyes, then asked, "Even you?"

Spike smiled at that, saying, "Yeah, even me, whelp. After all, what would those girls of your say if I left you to rot?"

"They'd kick your ass."

"Come back from the dead to do it, they would."

Xander sighed then shook his head, the last of the red fading from his eyes as he laughed again. Looking at the mess around them, he scuffed his boots against the pavement, then said, "Let's get out of here. I was supposed to take Reski out tonight for dinner."

"So you a_re_ bedding the halfy!"

"Spike?"

"Yeah, whelp?"

"Shut up."


	8. Some Happiness is Not Illegal

"Xander," murmured Reski in his ear as she cuddled close, her skin warm against his, "you need to sleep."

"Yeah, I know," he said softly, resting his hand over hers where it draped across his chest. "But…"

"But?"

Groaning, Xander tilted his head to look at her before lifting her hand to his lips, gently kissing it.

"I love you, y'know that?"

Reski pursed her lips, eyes narrowed, and stated, "You're ignoring the question, my vampire."

"Why do you call me that?" he asked, shifting slightly so he was somewhat facing her.

"Because that's what you are: my vampire. My very brave, noble, half-mad vampire," she replied. Then she retrieved her hand from his grasp and lightly punched him. "And you're still avoiding my question. Why can't you sleep?"

Xander shifted his gaze away from her then back and she clearly saw the fear in his eyes. Tutting, she pulled him towards her, and he came, resting his head on her shoulder as their bodies pressed close. "Oh, my vampire," she breathed, "you're so afraid of going back to that, aren't you?"

He shuddered in her arms then gasped into her shoulder, "I lost myself there, Res. I lost everything I was and I haven't even gotten most of it back. And I'm afraid…I'm afraid if they took me again I'd lose everything and be only a madman, that mindless feral killer."

"I'm not letting anyone take you," promised the half-demon. "And neither are Bob or Spike. You know that. We're not going to let anything hurt you again."

"And what if you get hurt?" asked Xander, pulling back. "What if you get killed?"

Reski grasped his face then and said very clearly, "Then I get hurt. Or I die. If it but keeps you from falling into those people's hands again, I'll do it. I might not have known you before, nor have known you long, but I can see the good in you, Xander."

He frowned then softly said, "I can't. Not anymore."

She felt tears in her eyes at the hopelessness in his voice and drew him close again, running her fingers through his hair. "I can," she murmured through the tears, "believe me, my vampire, I can.

---

Reski frowned over her cup of coffee as she heard the swift tapping of computer keys. Moving out of the kitchen, she peered into the den of her small apartment and saw Bob sitting at her desk with his laptop. Spike was sprawled across her couch snoring, a blanket covering his face from the morning sun streaming in.

Slowly she entered the room and Bob looked up as she moved to stand next to him, his eyes under circled by dark spots and going red in the whites. With a frown, she set down the mug, saying, "You look like you need this more than I do."

"Thanks," said the immortal man, gratefully smiling at her as he picked up the mug and blew across the surface. "I'm almost done."

"Almost done what?" she asked, leaning forward. At the sight of the military emblem in the top corner of the screen, she gasped, "Lord in Heaven, Bob, you've hacked into the _military_?!"

"Trying to weed out that damn branch of people intent on getting their slimy paws on Xander," he replied before downing a long gulp of coffee. "God, that's good. I didn't know you drank it black."

Reski shrugged, saying, "Wakes me up better."

"Point. And don't worry, they can't trace a thing. I've learned a good bit in my years, mostly from a hacker integrated into my unit just after Sunnydale sank. Kid was good and I got him to teach me a thing or two."

The half-demon blinked then softly said, "I think hacking into the government without worry is more than a little thing or two, Bob."

"Okay, so a thing or three," shrugged off the immortal. "But! Look what I've done…see this branch here?" He pointed to a name at the top of the screen and she nodded. Bob then grinned and tapped in a few keystrokes…

And the page disappeared, replaced by another that stated that the page could not be found. Reski gaped then stared at the grinning Bob, hissing, "What did you do?!"

Bob grinned wickedly in response. "I deleted it. That's what I've been doing, just systematically going through all the government systems to find any trace of it and deleting it. It doesn't exist now and will show up as _never_ having existed. Anyone involved with it at _any_ point in time is also in a load of shit; the lower ranks are looking at immediate discharge and disgrace, life in the real world. Upper ranks and those in charge…oh those'll be pretty damn beautiful."

"What'd you do?" she breathed, in awe now.

"Gathered up the information of just what they had done, including Xander imprisonment while leaving out his name because despite the fact that he's a vampire, he was born a damn US citizen and that shit doesn't fly. They're looking at jail time for a long time."

Reski blinked a few times then threw her arms around his neck, kissing his cheek. She marveled at this man! Simply marveled!

"Oh, Bob," she squealed happily, "I think I love you."

"Trading one immortal for another?" grumbled Xander from the doorway. "Res, shame on you."

Laughing, she let go of Bob and moved over to the vampire, wrapping her arms around him. Resting her chin against his chest, she smiled up at him, saying, "You know I love you most."

"But of course," murmured Xander, shifting her so he could lean over and kiss her. "Now what's Bob done?"

"Destroyed a government agency and the lives of every piece of scum that was in on it," replied the immortal as he turned in his chair. Then he hummed happily as he cupped the mug of coffee in both hands. "And, God, boy, your woman makes fine coffee."

"Her secret's mixing a hair of vodka in it," said the vampire. He then frowned and asked, "And all of them? The one's that took me?"

Bob nodded, "One in the same. They're done for, kaput, gone, finito. Ended. Kicked the bucket. So on and so forth." He then held out one arm, grinning, and said, "Now, c'mon, tell me I'm good. Because I can damn bloody good."

Xander blinked then looked down at Reski before laughing and lifting her up to kiss her soundly. "They're gone!"

"They're gone!" she agreed, grinning.

"God, Bob, I could kiss you!" exclaimed the vampire.

"Your girl might get jealous. And I'd say let's go for a celebratory drink but I'm ready to collapse and, well, y'know Spike here'd burst into flames."

"Tonight then," said Reski. "At my bar. Hell, I'll have free drinks for everyone tonight to celebrate."

Xander smiled, saying, "You'll have a happy bar."

Bob nodded then set the empty mug down next to his laptop, pressing the button to shut it down. Then he rose, stretching, before yawning and smiling sheepishly at Reski.

"You wouldn't mind if I…"

"Guest room's that way," she said, pointing towards the hallway. "Its small but I guess you don't care."

"It has a bed. Bed is good," grunted Bob, shrugging out of his coat as he disappeared into the hallway. Reski smiled after him then shrieked as Xander lifted her up into his arms, forcing her to wrap her legs around his waist to stay up.

He kissed her fiercely for a moment then leaned back, eyes bright with delight.

"I don't have to be afraid anymore," he said happily. "They're gone! Res, they're _gone!_"

"Yes," she murmured, just as happy as him. Her fingers grasped his face as she continued, "they're gone. Oh, my vampire, my Xander!"

He smiled then moved to where her back was pressed against the doorframe, hungrily kissing her neck. Then he moved to her mouth again in a hungry kiss then murmured, "You still have to help me. Help me sleep. Help me remember."

"Always," breathed Reski. She then smiled and ground her hips against his, drawing a gasp then a growl out of the vampire. Leaning close, she nibbled on the edge of his ear before whispering, "I can help you sleep right now."

"Sleep," growled Xander as he pressed her further against the doorframe, hands moving to her thighs, "is not what I first had in mind."

"Neither did I," growled Reski back, feeling pride that she was the reason for the dark pink impeding on his green/hazel eyes. That was _her_, not any other woman he had loved before her!

His mouth hungrily took hers again then they were moving, his hands fumbling at the hem of her shirt, trying to tug it over her head even as they kissed. Reski laughed merrily as he slammed the door closed then threw her on the bed, growling before he followed.

In the living room, Spike lifted his blanket covered head and grumbled, "Lovebirds," before he rolled over and went back to sleep with a grumpy snore.

Bob, still only just drifting at the edge of sleep in the guest room, heard them and smiled. He was glad Xander had found that girl; she was just what he had needed after those sixty years of madness. Still smiling, he pulled the blankets over his head and sank on into a deep sleep.

* * *

**Note:** If you don't remember from CoD, the pink eye-color change is lust. 


	9. The Darkest Days

"You've got to be fucking kidding me," snarled Xander, slamming his fist into the wall next to him. It shook but didn't break thanks to the work that had gone into building the underground shelter they were in. Work so he wouldn't dent holes in the wall and to keep out anything that wanted to get inside.

The world had quite literally gone to hell in the past twenty years, the demons and creatures of the night led to it by a half-god. And humanity had gone into hiding, just little segments of resistance that sheltered the few fighters they had left that could battle the darkness around them.

"I'm afraid not," said the speaker, whose name was William Eberts. He was one of the last Watchers and was nothing more than a child so far as Xander was concerned.

Then again, the vampire was one hundred and seventy-five now – give or take a few years. And he personally considered himself older because of the few lingering memories of Darien's that stretched back across three centuries.

Xander pinched the bridge of his nose then leaned on the table, a growl rumbling in his chest. He felt Reski's hand slide into his then and welcomed the gentle touch of her mind against his, all his barriers letting her slide right through. That touch cooled his temper enough that the growl faded away and he could speak without wanting to rip someone's head off.

"As if we haven't had trouble enough," grumbled Xander. He ran his other hand back through his hair, then frowned at William. "You're certain though? I learned a long time ago not to trust Council information farther than I could throw it."

Spike, leaning back in his chair, smirked and looked ready to comment about just how far he could throw things but Xander silenced him with a glare. The blond held up his hands briefly then folded his arms, waiting for the Watcher.

William stammered a little since he was still somewhat at awe of where he was. As the youngest of the last Watcher's, he had been integrated to the front lines with the current Slayer. Thus he was staring at faces he had only heard of in Council records: William the Bloody aka Spike, Hrothbert Bainbridge the immortal soldier, and Alexander Harris the vampire like none other.

"Erm…yes, I'm very certain. We checked it over thoroughly before I was sent here."

Xander scowled at that then straightened, saying, "Alright then, we've got our work cut out for us tonight, folks. Rituals are bad in general when the Black Hats are involved…its even worse when they've got access to the Hellmouth."

He winced as he said it, as that loss had been a blow to their side's pride. The place they were in had been their secondary base in what had been Chicago – the first had been located around the Hellmouth and set to defend it.

But they had been betrayed from within and it had been taken.

And Xander had not had a shred of disgust for killing the little shit that had cost his people so many lives in trying to defend that damn hole in the ground.

Bob leaned onto the table then and asked, "So what's the plan? Half the squad's are still recovering and those baby Slayer's that the Council sent over to be trained with the Watcher here aren't ready."

"I don't have a plan," growled Xander. "There isn't really anything we _can_ plan for this situation, Bob. We've got shit to get through to get in there and more to go through to get to the casters. We just don't have enough muscle."

The door of what had been proclaimed the war room slammed open then and the Slayer, a redheaded firestorm of fury packed in a tiny body, stalked in. She had blood streaming from a cut on her forehead into her gray eyes but there was a vicious look on her face as she hefted the weapon in her hands.

"Found it," she purred. "It was right there in the old Vault's, waiting for the taking."

Xander's eyes widened and if he needed to breath, he'd have stopped for a moment. Then he grinned, the expression slowly turning feral, and he looked at Bob.

"We," he growled, "now have a plan." Turning down the table to the two leaders of their few scattered witches, he snapped, "You two have the spell, right?"

At their nods, he purred, "Good. Get to work on that. Meri…" The Slayer locked eyes with him instantly. "…get the girls together and gather them around. That spell goes off in half an hour and I want them all there in one place just to make sure they get caught in it. 'Cause I love our witches but they're not my Wills by a long shot."

The three nodded and rose, quickly leaving the room. Spike came to his feet a moment later and hissed, "That was the bloody _Scythe_!"

"Yep," confirmed Xander.

"Wha… Bugger all, whelp, what are you plotting?"

The vampire grinned in response.

"Oh, Spike, I'm doing something marvelous – something that Wills that up way back in Sunnydale before the end. It's going to give us just what we need."

"What's that?" asked William curiously.

"An edge," replied Xander. He smiled and gripped Reski's hand in his as he continued, "Not much but…it might just give us enough to end this damn war."

William's eyes widened as Spike grinned ferally, reaching into his coat for a celebratory smoke. Bob leaned on the table, though, and asked softly, "You're sure you want to do this to those girls?"

Xander shook his head at that.

"No, I don't," he said. "But we need them. We need not one Slayer but many. Because we can't win like this – not anymore."

"And we can with them?"

"I hope to God so, Bob," murmured Xander mournfully. "I really do. Because if not…we're all going to die anyway."

---

"I'm coming with you," stated Reski as he sat on the edge of their bed, tugging on his boots. Xander clenched his teeth then growled, "You can't."

"Why not?!"

"Because I don't want to lose you!" exploded the vampire, rising. He closed his eyes then was suddenly in front of her, his hands clasping her face. Slowly his gaze roved over her, taking in the few changes – she was forty-five, his demon, but she didn't look anymore than her late twenties. But he could see and smell the age in her. Stroking her hair back, he breathed, "I lost everything I loved once, Res. Faith, Giles, Wills, Dawn, Di…torn away before their time or before I could see them in the end. And I know…"

He choked up for a moment on a sudden lump in his throat then managed to continue past it.

"…some day you'll die. I don't want that day to be today. I don't want to have to watch you die in battle."

Reski frowned then nodded, wrapping her arms around him. His slowly fell from her face and he held her tightly against his chest, burying his face in her hair. She felt the tremors running up and down his spine, the fear she only spoke of to him consuming him.

The fear of being alone that had plagued him since he'd become immortal. And even more so since those bastards had held him for sixty years as an experiment.

"What if you die out there?" she breathed against his neck. "What will I do then, my vampire?"

"By then it wouldn't matter," he replied in a choked voice. "You know as well as I do if I'm gone that's it. The end. Of everything."

"Yeah…"

Shuddering, Reski trembled in his arms then asked, "Why couldn't it have stayed simple? I mean, we could be in my bar right now, drinking our cares away."

"If only," breathed Xander. He then shifted, looking at his watch, then said, "Thirty minutes until I have to go."

"Thirty?" she asked, burying her face in his shirt.

"Yeah…Res…"

Snarling, she reached up to grasp his face, tugging him downward, her mouth hungrily covering his. As she drew back, gnawing on his lip, she growled, "Shut up. Shut up, God damnit, and make love to me. I need this – _we_ need this. Now more than ever."

Xander didn't need any more prompting than that. He caught her mouth with his then lowered her back onto the bed, surprised when she suddenly pulled off her shirt and turned her head to the side.

Offering him her throat, he realized after a moment.

"Res," he breathed, starting to draw away.

"No," she growled, dragging him back down. "You need to be at your best for this. I know that. You know that. And that means you need the freshest blood you can get."

"I_can't_."

Reski shook her head at that, smiling sadly. "Please, my vampire."

"Res…"

"_Please!_ I want you to come back to me!"

Xander's terrified gaze softened at that and he murmured, "Always, Res." He then took a deep breath before moving back down to her, continuing what they had begun.

Their lovemaking was slow, taking their time to enjoy what might be their last moments together even with the time limit. And only at the edge as they lay next to each other, Reski sleepily turning her head to the side again, did Xander do as she asked. He shifted then lowered his head to her throat and she only just felt the twinge of his fangs in her neck. Her hands tangled in his hair as he growled against her throat, taking her blood in slow swallows.

At the sharp rap on their door, he pulled away, panting slightly as he propped himself above her. Reski smiled and reached up to wipe away the stream of blood at the corner of his mouth with her thumb, like he had been nothing more than a child. He stared down at her, some awe in his eyes, then snapped at the door, "I'm coming, damnit!"

"No, you just did," jibed Reski sleepily. Xander snorted then bent his head to kiss her. Then he kissed her neck where he had bitten her, the two imprints of his fangs already healed over – her demon blood gave her a few more things than just physic abilities.

"That," he rumbled into her ear, "is beside the point." Then he kissed her again, saying, "I love you. If I don't…"

She shushed his words with her fingers and shook her head.

"I love you," she said softly, not wanting a goodbye.

He nodded then slowly rose from the bed, putting his clothes back on and throwing on his gear. Sleepily, Reski curled up against the pillows and watched him as he got ready to go to battle with nothing but that Desert Eagle of his and two slightly curved short swords. Xander turned to look at her and smiled, leaning over to cup her cheek for a moment. Then he was gone, the door closing behind him, and she broke down into sobs, hating that she had promised to stay.


	10. The Oncoming Storm

"Go, go, go!"

Bob's shout propelled the Slayers forward through the explosion that had shattered the door, all thirty of them armed to the teeth. The immortal came in behind them, weighted down with guns armed for demon killing and opened fire.

Demons and vampires fell under the assault and through the middle of it sprinted Spike and Xander, the two vampires moving through the chaff that remained like an oncoming storm. Bob and the Slayers followed them as they finished their own fights and the small force plowed its way through the building.

They fought and ran then fought again, sealing doorway's behind them to prevent being ambushed from behind.

Five of the girls died fighting before they reached the floor that was the most defended – the one that protected the Hellmouth. Where the worst of the demons and the oldest of the vampires were.

Where the real fight began.

It helped that the whole bottom floor of the facility had been one big room with the Hellmouth in the center. Bob had specially come prepared for that with a bagful of grenades.

The immortal strode in first, Xander slamming the door shut behind him, and started unloading with a gun in one hand as he lifted grenades in the other. Reverberations from the explosions shook the group waiting and when they stopped the vampire threw the door open. Bob, looking worse for wear, came back through out of the smoke filled room slapping out small fires on his clothes, nodding to Xander, who dove into the smoke seconds later. As it cleared, the rest followed and they heard their leaders growl of, "We're surrounded," as clear as day even as they saw the demons around them.

"Good, good!" crowed a voice from beyond their surrounding enemies, which pealed back. The half-god that had begun the war grinned at them and waved before saying, "How nice to have you all…the immortal…"

Bob snorted and calmly reloaded his submachine gun with a new clip, a sound that rang hauntingly through the floor.

"…the vampire with a soul…"

Spike smirked, game face in place, and drew the broadsword slung across his back, making a few demons stepped back. Because, as they'd found out, the sword of the other Xander worked just as well on demons as vampires.

"…the girl who thinks she's a warrior…"

Meri, the Scythe in her hands, stepped forward from her sisters and stood proudly as the oldest Slayer before the demons.

"…and the boy who lost everything," finished the half-god, fixing his eyes on Xander. The vampire just stared right back, his head tilted slightly to the side and arms hanging loose.

But not then a half godling can stare forever into the insane, blood red eyes of the man every demon had feared since hearing of Sunnydale.

The half-god regained his composure, however, and spread his arms wide. "Welcome then!" he crowed. "Welcome to my moment of rejoicing. When I shall open the Hellmouth and become a god fit to rule this world!"

"No," stated Xander coldly.

"No?" repeated the half-god, his handsome face confused, golden curls shaking. His face then contorted with anger as he roared, "You aren't in any position to tell me 'no'! Kill them! _Kill them all!_"

The demons surged forward to do their master's will and the Slayers roared as one in defiance before they set to defend themselves with their strength and blades.

Bob stepped back then opened fire in careful bursts that went together with the girls in a deadly dance.

Spike, snarling, went careening into the demons, swinging the heavy blade in his hands with deadly accuracy.

But most terrifying, particularly to the half-god watching with a sneer, was Xander. The vampire had let several demons descend upon him as he calmly drew the two swords at his belt…then things had changed. He had turned into a blur of silver and dark clothes, streams of red following in his wake until there was a cloud of blood following him as he tore almost effortlessly through the demons.

Rage powered him through it all, making him an even worse opponent. He thought of all those that had died: his family, the good demons he had known that were slaughtered, all of the humans killed for sport or food.

He thought of all of them and the rage he felt at the losses made his limbs shake. His skin seemed to burn as he tore through another demon and he would hear the Rogue urging him on for more death, for more killing. And he opened the thin wall he'd erected between them and welcomed it again for the first time since he had fought to be separate from it.

The half-god staggered in fear as the vampire was suddenly before him, his eyes blazing with even more madness if such were possible. Xander cocked his head to the side then asked in an echoing voice, "Scared, little god?"

"Not of you!" he roared back, regaining some bravado. He could sense the Hellmouth starting to open up underneath them and smiled. Lashing out with his fist at the vampire, he grinned when the punch looked ready to connect.

Then he was on the ground in pain, his arm broken in three places in an instant.

"Godling," snorted Xander above him, that echoing voice that was the voice he knew and one he didn't sending shivers up his spine. "You're worthless."

"I will be a GOD!"

"No," purred the vampire, crouching down. "The cards, I'm afraid, aren't in your favor."

"Don't underestimate me," growled the half-god. He scrambled at his pockets for something then hissed, "I can kill us all, the whole of this wreck of a city!"

"Do it."

He blinked. Stared. And suddenly the world shrank to the two of them.

The vampire was daring him to finish his threat.

And he smiled as he realized finally why the demons feared him so. Why the dark powers behind Wolfram and Hart had called him into this world to start this war two decades ago.

They had wanted to see just how far they could go.

How far they could push him.

And that answer was here at the edge of the ever-widening Hellmouth.

Xander Harris, vampire and last remaining of the so-called Scooby Gang of Sunnydale, would go to the edge and over it if need be.

"Didn't think so," snapped the vampire, picking the half-god up by the collar of his shirt. He lifted him up and dangled him over the mouth of the portal to Hell, tentacles of something within slowly reaching up. "Since you opened it, you get to go inside. Hope you have fun playing god in Hell."

The half-god laughed brokenly then said, "Oh, I will. And you still have no idea yet of what you face, Harris. Just wait. Just…wait."

Xander sneered and the Rogue broke through fully for a moment, purring in its insane cackle, "Whatever it is, it ain't got nothing on us. And we'll be waiting."

Then he let go.

As the Hellmouth closed with the one holding it open within, Xander urged the Rogue back just enough that he could be in full control again. It sulked, complaining that it never got to have any fun, and he shushed it.

The rapport of gunfire rang through the floor then all was quiet but for the panting breaths of those left standing and a few sobs from the injured. Bob let his gun hang back down by its strap and called across to Xander, "That it, kid?"

The vampire frowned, looking down at the closed seal, remembering the half-god's words.

"…_you still have no idea yet of what you face, Harris. Just wait…_"

"No," he replied mournfully. "Somehow, Bob, I get the feeling that we've still got a long way to go."


End file.
